Say What?!

Since Kelly is using one of her two vacation posts, we contacted Ms. Spears the author of a much acclaimed parenting book to help us with our evening links.  Enjoy!

• Carlton is slicker than a harpooned hippo on a banana tree, knockin’ knees with a porn star!
• Brett Michaels is ridin’ a gravy train on biscuit wheels. potp
• These two fell out of the ugly tree and hit every branch on the way down. cbs
• Brit and K-Fed are nuttier than a port-a-potty at a peanut festival. cs
• Santa during the off-season, with a girl who is hornier than a two peckered billy goat. crave may not be 100% sfw ya’ll!
• Melissa Joan Harts naked preggo picks go over like a pregnant pole vaulter icydk
• My lil girl made Ashlee Simpsons new video nuttin but a fart in the wind! dl
• The state tells Tom Sizemore, “don’t let the door hit ya where the good lord split ya.” sl